This Day, Last Year…


Today is that blessed day. (Written on August 29th)

This day,  last year,  a very unassuming me in the eighth month of my pregnancy was all prepared to make the most of the last month of my pregnancy and eventually be ready to have my baby naturally. It was around six in the evening that the painless bleeding started and I couldn’t muster up any reasons for the same.

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It was a time no one was indoors at the hostel,  most of them were out for tea,  shopping etc. And only one of them was in, having just come in after her occasional part time job. I was reluctant to call her considering how tired she must be. But she agreed to accompany me to the hospital anyway. We made a run for it. I was only prepared for a minor check up and rest,  and be released soon,  just like I had gone through in the 30th week. This was barely 5 weeks later.

One hospital refused to take me in since I was far along and had never consulted a doctor there. I was referred to another nearby hospital that was equipped well for ob-gyn cases.
I informed my husband and my mother and told them I would call if I am going to be kept there for observation.

Thanks to Carmel for all the running she did for the official matters concerning my admission to the hospital. If it weren’t for you,  I would have been totally emotional and angry at everything I thought to be unfair. Illogical as well.

By half past nine, my hubby got there at the hospital. I was put in the Labour room, where there were many other beds, and no other women with labour pain. I was checked. The fetal heart rate was checked often. It was all fine. I was taken in for an ultrasound scan. Which revealed abruption of placenta (the oxygen and nutrients were being cut off to the baby and as time passed by,  it would become fatal to the baby.). Such a fine line of bleeding  behind the placenta.

A young ob-gyn approached me. She was very pretty,  slim and adept. She talked fast and professionally. I was not convinced that I had to undergo a cesarean section to save my baby. Not after all that natural birth and homoeopathic remedies I had planned. My husband was outside in the lobby and he whatsapp-ed me that the doctor was advising a c-section. He seemed as incredulous as me, not to mention the overwhelming feeling just before believing that you were finally going to meet that little person you have been waiting for 9 –  er…  8 months.

I was ravenous. The last thing I had was lunch. And once the c-section was decided upon, they told me not to drink any water. And certainly no food. I have never been hungrier in my life,  if I have to recall that night. And hubby was there with a take-out chicken fried rice from a nearby restaurant that we used to go for an occasional dinner. Ah,  I sacrificed that too.

I had a premature delivery at week 35 via an emergency c-section. It all whizzed past me, the stark white and achingly bright OT, the much dreaded spinal anaesthesia (I hate it, period) and the machines and tubes and doctors conversing and then that tiny squeaky cry… My consciousness was fuzzy when they showed me my little girl. Born at 11.29 pm, on 29th of August. The numbers like I was born at  5.22 am on 22nd of August. Somehow in the daze, I was thinking about that.

I remember being numb and fuzzy and the excruciating pain of the pelvic stitches and all throes after the event, the pain of staggering through the Labour ward to the NICU where my baby girl was lodged for 4 days. Yeah,  she was not with me. It remains a memory of disbelief And not to mention the spinal headache –  side-effect of spinal anaesthesia. Top it all with disappointment of having had a c-section.

But none of these matter when I look at the bundle of chubbiness taking up a big portion of my day and of course I have got over all those shocks and surprises, all natural dreams and all. I would,  anyone would,  when you realize what you almost lost.

I know this is a very long  post. I have wanted to write about that day for long, when I am ready. And I finally have. But it is all there is. There is a lot that I would normally describe but skipped. I thought of leaving a cliffhanger somewhere and continue in the next post,  but I have continued well into the next day, so it is as good as split.

Well, it was her first birthday and mine, too. A new mother was born.  A new me.

I am yawning like a hippo. That says I should sleep. 🙂 I will update posts on missed details some time soon.
Goodnight..

Love, Sana

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Up and Running Again (Trying to…)


Finally,  I am here to evaluate and acknowledge that this blog of mine is an ignored part of my writing. As much as I had resolutions about this blog that I never kept,  I have to swear life doesn’t go as planned.
Well… No,  no,  I am guilty of achieving most of the things I have planned (excluding this blog),  but they did come at a price. I would rather name the stake results as incompetence and defocussing.
Now,  examining every social and personal aspect,  life has been fairly good.
I am a wife,  a housemaker and a mother to a one year old bundle of chubbiness.
And a doctor.
A. N. D…  A writer, of course. Which is why I’m here. 😀
(What I was not was, regular. Here.)
This blog was meant to be a journal, but I realized I can’t rant about anything and everything because of how irregular it becomes. I have to wait for inspiration and sometimes, it never comes. Sometimes, I never get there.

So,  let’s get down to what we know,  or what we don’t. At least in the familiar circles (field). This place will still be a ranting place but about my writing and also my new field – motherhood (not the creative aspects with pictures of all those DIY toys that you made, but more like the punch it packs altogether on your life).
The lighter side of dark circles,  literally.
I will of course try to be regular,  which was a resolution I had announced on this very blog,  but never got to keep. But,  now I have got this WordPress app and hope to stick to my word.
So testing it…  🙂

See you all soon… Have a lovely day!

Love, s.r.

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Between, that's us. Happiness. 🙂

Between, that’s us. Happiness. 🙂

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Giveaway…! June 7th – 18th!


So there, here’s letting me know you, shortly, in the midst of a busy life, that ‘The Torrent from My Soul’ ebook is available for FREE on the Smashwords site. That’s for 9 more days though!

So here’s where you go to get your copy…. (Click on the cover image below). The free copy there includes digital formats EPUB, MOBI/KINDLE, LRF, PDB, etc. But for PDF ebooks with my own perfect formatting, please contact me. 🙂

You can leave a message in any of the contact forms available to message me – in this blog, in the website or in my FB page.

TFMS cover 1+2

 

 

Hope you enjoy the book and share the news that it’s FREE till JUNE 18th morning! 🙂

Have a great day!

Love, Sana

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As Promised…


The Torrent from My Soul: Poems of A Born Dreamer, my first collection of poetry is once again out there for you. And that too with a fresh look and a better soul. For now, it is available on Smashwords, where I created the ebook in various formats. It is not an unknown platform and yeah, they will soon distribute it to other retailers like the Amazon and even Flipkart in India. TFMS cover 1+2 The ebook formats available are EPUB, MOBI (KINDLE), PDB, LRF and PDF. But for PDF ebooks, I would rather that you own a copy that I specially formatted to make it comfortable to read as well as have a decent appearance, instead of the one available on Smashwords. However, if you are using reflow option, it wouldn’t matter much.

The PDF from Smashwords is not so great as the font size is pretty small for the page size and they have done nothing more than save it as PDF like anyone can do on MS Word. So, I have made a better format with front page cover included in the PDF file. And if that’s the copy you want, drop me a message on my website. Or here through the contact form.

So there, let me know. 🙂 Those who find any difficulty in getting the ebook, contact me. I will make sure you get a copy.

This post was written yesterday but it’s been raining cats and dogs here since 2 days and electricity gave up on us often. And my internet went berserk last night but I couldn’t post it. The rains have stopped for now but thank God for the chill. It’s a much-awaited relief from this year’s cruel heat. So there, I will give myself some rest now.

Goodnight…

Love, Sana

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Another Monthly Peek!


Well, here I am with another peek after a week less than a month later. 🙂

While editing my novel, I always had this thought of my first book ever. As I had already mentioned in previous post, the book is no more in print. But since it’s more important to have the book out there and available to read, I have decided to publish an ebook of “The Torrent from My Soul: Poems of A Born Dreamer” through Smashwords. So I have been busy formatting the manuscript accordingly, and of course, designing a cover image.

The cover of the previous print version was a tad bit academic in appearance. Perhaps drab even. So, I decided to try something on my own since I am someone who knows the book and the poetry within throughout. I can’t expect designers to do cover designs after reading the book. None of us can. But this time, everything is at my own disposal. I want my earliest poetry out there to those who would love to read it. Once more. So here’s the cover image that came from my laptop and a day’s work. Yeah, it’s just a day’s work. 🙂 As the poet I can connect the cover to my personal poems. And some of my closest friends who have read the whole book have voted for this cover design.

So… Here’s it!

TFMS cover 1+2So let me know how this looks as any random book. If it looks good enough to pick. 😉 I am off again, till I hear from you guys. Ciao!

Love, Sana

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A Writer Can…


Well… take a break to really do something with her writing.

Albeit that wasn’t exactly why I was away. But I am humbled to see a few comments that sound so wonderful and really encouraging here on some posts and from people I haven’t come across yet. 🙂 Thanks for dropping by though the blog has been literally dead for months.

What has been happening with my life may not be particularly interesting to the bunch of you but it’s not that boring. I will give the headlines, just to justify my not-so-noted absence.

  • I passed out college and is an intern doctor now, happy to have actually begun collecting failures and experiences (Both are inevitable and important in the development of a Homeopathic Phyician, the former more than the latter.)
  • I got married. And yeah, that’s a huge change.
  • Poetry has got blocked somewhere inside me and has been lost for months now.
  • I terminated the book contract of my first book “The Torrent from My Soul”. The book is not in print anymore. It does sound like a bad writer but it’s a brilliant decision I made in my entire life. Because my poetry and I deserve better than that publisher’s money making agendas. Sorry, but carnivores do exist in all fields. That’s one of the things I did for the first time and the last – falling prey to anyone. (If anyone is interested in reading that first collection of mine, please let me know in comments or as a message, I would be happy to get you a digital copy of its revised edition as soon as possible.) 🙂
  • After long, I have been reading – and yes, with better sense of what’s good and what’s not good enough (nothing is too bad, but we have to classify just to make sure we know the difference and utilize time instead of wasting it).
  • And there – the last but not the worst or least important – I began the journey of truly editing Amidst Sandcastles – my novel. Which was finished many times. Edited many times and yet got rejected because of one single reason. Probably the most amateurish reason, because, mistakes could be corrected, style could be polished – all without losing the story and its essence – but length reduction? That’s a long story. Really.

I was afraid to lose it. Afraid to actually face it. But then I began looking at it with my new eyes that are less emotional and sensitive now, may be even less creative and more practical – that’s indeed less fanciful (I am pretty sure it has everything to do with the constitutional Homoeopathic treatment I took for a health problem and not being able to write even plain, let alone exceptional, poetry anymore.). It is quite undesired, but the reduced emotional turbulence is indeed a relief at times. And that’s pretty much why I was able to cross-read my novel and how its elephantine word count has been reduced by a good 50K – which is, well, not close to done yet.

But – here, this is for those aspiring writers out there – I am not established yet, but I think having done this does make me person enough to say this:

If you feel something is impossible, it is probably possible when you start to think instead of feel. It has undoubtedly helped me. But of course, leave thinking part to the end. Because your writing- story or whatever – needs you with all the feeling to get real. Just evade melodrama – it’s cheesy. And cheesy can get mouldy. 🙂

Few things I learnt while searching for editing tips and length-reduction ideas that I practised:

  • There’s a lot you wrote that can happily go down the drain. No one expects you to give account of what your hero or heroine does every other second. No reader expects you to fill in every gap in their minds.
  • Once you have done with your most precious darlings – which are probably the best parts you loved writing – examine how many times you have appeased yourself saying the same things over and over again. We tend to repeat things we love, naturally. I found many instances in my novel that was kinda written again and again to justify particular scenarios. Trust your readers’ memories – they will remember the strengths, weaknesses and motives of your characters. Make your characters unforgettable, that’s your job. You are their creator, not their defense lawyer.
  • Think well over the number of POV’s in your story – it was a huge matter in my novel – obviously, the more the POV’s are, the longer the book gets. As long as a particular  POV is not necessary to advance your story, maybe – just maybe – it’s time to create another junk folder. I am glad that this occurred to me because, since both the hero and heroine are important to me (of course, the relationship with your story and characters gets personal), I tend to write the same scene in both of their POV’s. That’s a huge chunk of repetition. Of course, there’re many other opportunities to reveal how one of them had felt at that time, while we describe from the other’s angle.

Well, it’s a tad bit unfair to write a LONG post on how to SHORTEN your writing. So I guess, I will get back to work. Being the intern doctor on night duty shift alone without company or patients can get boring (It was election-day today, so people haven’t been as sick as usual since morning. That makes me wonder if they get sick more often when they are sure the doctors are working?), but that’s where the joy of being a writer comes. Call me crazy, but I am never alone. 🙂

Take care everyone! And oh, by the way, let me share a small quote that will prove many a writer’s reasons right. I shared it on my FB page already but, I love it too much:

“Fiction gives us a second chance that life denies us.” 
-Paul Theroux, novelist (b. 1941) 

Love, Sana

Reading now: Honour by Elif Shafak, a Turkish writer. Awesome one at that, if you love a daring book, which is not so commonplace.

honour-elif-shafak

What are you reading? 🙂

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Reflections After 25 Years of Breathing… (And Much More!)


“The only man who never makes mistakes is the man who never does anything.”

– Theodore Roosevelt

Blossoms

I guess the time to contemplate whether you have lived or just existed through the last 25 years is not exactly on your birthday. But I have chosen today, lest the thoughts vanish in another moment.
And yeah, today is uneventful (Except for the dinner date with my husband this evening). Nevertheless, I am in a state of disbelief.

I don’t want to just fade away. I would like to leave a trail and say that I have travelled this way one day. And a worthy way at that. In another time, in another set of mind and dreams, in totally another range of attitude that I think I had had, my concerns would have been different.

I have to admit that there was a time when I thought of 25 as so big and grown up. Everyone of us have. And there was a time when the visions I had of myself at 25 included another home, a baby, a job, and several other matters that held the title ‘Settled’. But life looks so far – not so far, still far – from any of these. Instead, here I am still just as giggly when I got together with my best girl friends from school last week. Just the same – looking no different – may be better – than last year. (I owe one to love and happiness.)

Weird or not, nothing is that close to our plans. Or better yet, assumptions. I don’t think a book was in the picture back then. But today as I reflect upon what has happened and what has remained and yes, what has been promising… I see beautiful views. Perhaps nothing is the same as I had one wished for. Most things are more than I wished for.

I have a book with my name printed on it. 🙂

I see myself working to have more of those tangible dreams. 🙂

I have readers. From places and spheres I have never been to. 🙂
I have friends that I have found to have remained across time, changed and distances. 🙂

I have my family with me. And I have a loving husband waiting there for me to start our life together once done with college. 🙂

I have a part time job that I like, one that gives me the satisfaction of being self reliant and helpful. 🙂

And yeah, I’m finishing my degree in one of the noblest medical sciences ever found – Homeopathy. 🙂

I am 25 and I have a list of good things to think of.
But still I had this pang when I sort of chose to think that I am closer to 30 now than I was last year. That’s a pretty twisted thing to think. May be it’s the feeling that I haven’t done all that I can – could have – in this span of time. But how do you measure that? No space for comparison in that matter because each of us are different.
This pang of a need to leave a mark before leaving is perhaps what drives me.

I am a Muslim girl from a conservative society but I want to make that the reason for a positive difference rather than an excuse not to try.
This is a sane need, I reckon. A fair thinking.
And that’s how I decided to give change a try. I have ordered two new books from amazon.in. Two authors I have never read before (will talk about that after I get my books) but reviews tell me they are the kinds I need to read to take the leap of faith – to shift genres, to try new spheres, to believe in the capability of my own words… To be really different. To break away from myself and the box that’s my life and float away to distances and places undiscovered.

To dare to try more…

I have a story to tell – a different one that still has no shape in my mind. But I already know that to tell that story, I need to master my own thought process, muster some amount of courage. To begin that kind of change, something has got to change in my reading. I guess that’s the place to start from. To embark on my journey for a change in the literary side of the person I am.
However, for a person who was feeling dispirited and a tad bit old on her 25th birthday, there’s nothing better than being able to write a poem that’s inspirational, to self and others. 🙂
So, here it goes:

All It Takes

All it takes is sometimes a glance
To get on your feet and blithely dance…

All it takes is sometimes a kiss
To remember that one true promise…

All it takes is sometimes a twist
To find yourself lost in a hazy mist…

All it takes is sometimes a pause
To learn that fate isn’t always the cause…

All it takes is sometimes a song
To realize that life does not last so long…

All it takes is just the right spirit
To live today like it’s the last precious bit…

© Sana Rose 2013

Have a great day or evening, as it goes, everyone.

Love and Peace to All…

… Sana

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Back on Independence Day!


It’s been a long, long break. Too long for just one ‘O’. February 2012 is a month I don’t really remember much about. Seems like my last post was there. However, I had lots going on since then. Life has changed a lot – I’m sure everyone of yours has changed as well.

The changes include many things I don’t want to think about. Or mention, for that matter. And some include things like going legal with my lover of four years (We got the marriage certificate in December 2012 :)…), my old netbook turned against me and it was a long battle with Windows and Linux and all that change. Had exams in between that, to slow me down on my novel, however, I completed it earlier this year. These are just tidbits and the more interesting things are in the former list of those that I don’t want to think about. And I’m positive that you don’t really care about these stuffs. But before coming to the flesh of my post, I wanted to say a few excuses to no one in particular, so that I can think of blogging again after such a long time as one and half years.

Well, then I have been active on my FB page with updates about my writing, and even some first draft excerpts from Amidst Sandcastles (I know that’s not wise actually, but anything to feel alive! 🙂 ).

Independence-Day-Celebration-With-Flowers

Now, the Indian Independence Day is here once more. I haven’t been thinking or writing much on the last one. But today I have a few thoughts to share. 🙂 

As a writer, I believe :
A word is meant to be true…
The thoughts behind the word sincere.

And the intent clear.

Hopefully, I am still waiting for a day when the word and reality shall blend…

It would be ungrateful to say India is still slaving or not independent…
But the mind is the origin of everything we do. That’s where we gotta start examining it…
Instead of making it a mere day of wishing each other ‘Happy Independence day’, it’s time to reflect upon whether you are truly free…

… From your own narrow mindedness.
… From the shackles of your own misunderstandings and wrong beliefs.
… From your own past.

… From the evil thoughts that corrupt hearts.
… From jealousy at one another.
… From self-pity, selfishness, anger and revengeful thoughts.

… From greed.
… From your own weak attitudes.
… From your own lame excuses.

The list could go on forever but the truth is that most of the dysfunction stems from these. 

This is not a lecture and not an ultimate list but find versions of these in your minds, at
your home, in your society and take one step at a time…
And then let’s wish with pride…

“Happy Independence Day!”

Wishing all fellow Indians the same and to everyone:

Smile, because you woke up today, too. 🙂

With Love…
… Sana

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Destiny and Choice


“Dying a bit everyday
Is my destiny…
But that being for you
Was my choice…..

– S.R.

 

 

There are two parts to every happening in our life. Destiny and Choice. Our life is sewn to both. But these are very much separated, too. The demarcation and boundaries are clear. And yet… don’t we often mix them up?

Yeah, it often goes like this:

You do something.
You realize it was a mistake.
You check what went wrong.
You find it was your decision or choice.
Your defense mechanism kicks in.
You look for an escape, for a justification to yourself and whosoever it may concern.
You check out all those things all over again.
You again find out that it’s your choice that went wrong.
You reflect upon what another possible reason could be.
You find the same could go wrong if that was your fate.
For once, you believe in Destiny, what’s written.
And you say, “Things went wrong, I’m so sorry but that was my fate. There was no way I could stop it…”
And when you look in the mirror the next time, you ask yourself, “Was it like that? There was nothing you could do to stop it?”
You know it wasn’t like that, but you led yourself to believe that it was destiny, fate, not your choice, not your decision, that put you in this particular situation.

Often, the choices go wrong in the long run when you give up what matters. For a temporary well-being, for a momentary escape, you often tend to choose material things over the priceless things.

Let’s examine a universal stuff – Break up. 🙂 After making all the mistakes, you realize, the person you love isn’t the same anymore. That you are not the same anymore. That you both need different things in life. We have two roads diverged here.

To stay. To let go.
To hold on to the debris. To walk away from what stinks.
To go on and let yourself rot. To break up and be fair to your heart.
There are always choices, aren’t there? No argument there.

While some manage to walk away, many stay back, wondering how to do it. How to just put a full-stop, after all this time together, all that they shared. True, it’s not that easy. Where would the promises go when you walk away? Where will the memories go? They don’t have a place to go, except where you go… But, what if staying just kills a small part of you every other moment, throwing you into a dark ocean from where the longer you stay, you can’t find a safe shore? Isn’t that frightening? Sometimes, it’s what you do that matters, not how you do it. In cases like this, to pinpoint. Because there aren’t many ‘how’s there… Only what happens in the end needs to be counted since both are likely to be hurt in the end anyway. Whether you make it quick or put it off till it will hurt more.

Now, that was dealing with a negative situation. But there are some simpler things that can take up our discussion now. Like loving someone itself. Something like my verses I stated in the beginning. 🙂 And like, you’re walking with a friend and when you share a moment of happiness, you reach out and hold his/her hand, and the moment you do it, you know it was because you wanted to. Not because it would’ve happened anyway. It may not have, and the importance of that moment is that, it won’t come again.

The importance of every moment you live is that it’s available to you only at that instant when you are in it. And that moment is crystallized only by one thing – your choices. What you choose to do at that moment, despite the odds, despite destiny itself. What you decide to be the memory attached to that moment. Not by what happened according to something that wasn’t under your control anyway.

I think rest of the thought is open to you. Let me wind up now reminding you a quote by Mark Twain, that has proven to be right in the long run. That is still being proven by each one of us day be every passing day.

“Twenty years from now, you will be more disappointed by the things that you didn’t do than by the ones you did do. So throw off the bowlines. Sail away from the safe harbor. Catch the trade winds in your sails. Explore. Dream. Discover.”

Wow! That. Is. Rejuvenating. (!!!) 🙂 🙂 🙂 Hope you all had a great weekend!

Love, Sana

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Love and Other Healers…


Life is such that only few of us hold onto what matters, only fewer even think of what matters. In the long run, we forget so much that we call it change. What changed there? Did we or the things that mattered? Does one change alone? Or both together?
Again, where do things go wrong as we go on? Where did things go wrong when we finally find ourselves in some strange place, where we haven’t been planning to go to?

We are the ones changing, no doubt. Everything else is relative to our aspirations, our needs, our dreams and our actions. When these things change, naturally what we get, what we experience changes, too. I have heard from more than one people that Love doesn’t exist anymore. Some are just too scared to believe in Love (or persons?). Either because of what they are seeing around them or because of their own painful experiences with love.

Yeah, Love is often about taking risks. Often about giving the other person the power to destroy you or revive you, as we have read in numerous text messages. But not to believe in Love anymore? A guy who was hurt in a past relationship said, “There’s no love. All is just an act.” I felt sorry for him. It was just the other day, when I had posted some sappy stuff in my FB status.
He is wrong, I stated. I told him that. Because, Love isn’t something you should generalize based on just your experience in life with a single person of the opposite sex. Where do other categories of love fall, when you say there’s no love anymore? The love that’s not a romantic love between you and a man/woman?

There are more people with love, living love, knowing love, sharing love in this world than those who don’t. It’s a fact. In one way or another. And one woman’s betrayal doesn’t mean every woman is deceptive. It only means that, that certain woman doesn’t deserve you. And likewise, one man’s ditching doesn’t mean all men ditch their women. Or that you’re not worthy to be loved or good enough. You could always be a princess to another man who is worthy of your heart.

All these are things everyone of us know. It goes without saying. But still, people are reluctant to believe it. Afraid that they might get hurt. Basic human defensive instinct. But, how long… how long will you live in fear? How long in disbelief? Not believing in Love, straying away from its path and looking at it with contempt is a more dangerous situation than murders and other crimes. In a way, isn’t all those crimes coming from a lack of love itself?

And yet there are some who are being pushed to believe that Love is about Lust, Money and Power. Even Lust is not about Money and Power. Then how will Love be? Lust is about the material aspect of your body. Money is about the material aspects in everything. Money is necessary but more money could be a tad bit too attractive and might repel you from the more important matters in life. And Power… It’s again something totally different from lust and money.

There are two kinds of Power, I believe. Like in most things. Positive and Negative. There is Power in Knowledge and Love. There is power in knowing other people’s secrets and lust and money. So, I wouldn’t say gaining power isn’t good. It depends on what kind of power you attain – whether it’s the gentle power of love and perseverance, like that of a mother’s, or whether it’s the destructive power of secrets, money and lust, like that of a seductress’.
Love, the word in itself, is tender. It sounds like something you want for life. Something that’s as subtle as your breath…

I have been writing for ten years now. A decade sounds beautiful and kind of gratifying. 🙂 And I have kept on experimenting with different kinds of writings. I have written many types of poems, a total of about 300 now. Many of which I have set aside as works of my younger years. And I have also moved from theme to theme, topic to topic. But one topic, one theme has remained with me. One theme has remained as my favourite and the favourite of my readers. Love, Hopes and Dreams. Fighting for these. Standing up for this Triad. Getting up from every fall. Letting yourself to cry and to laugh. Opening your heart and listening to it. It was never easy to write about these. I have had my share of pains and I have shared them with you, knowing that you can relate to it. Sorrow is such a universal thing. I have had my share of inspirations, dreams and happiness. And I share them with you through my poetry again. Love, with all its complexities, is that simple.

Night before yesterday, I watched a Hindi Movie “Zindagi Na  Milegi Dobara” (You Don’t Get Life A Second Time). Its theme is the age-old one “Seize The Moment, Live It!“. But the way the story was told through the ventures of three friends, on one of their Bachelor’s Party Trip. I am not going to the details of the movie because that would be long. But yeah, lemme say this, I think it was an awesome movie because it was one poetic stuff. 🙂 Javed Akhtar’s lyrics presented as one of the characters’ poetry, that’s quoted throughout the movie in the right places with the right blend of emotions and smiles is really admirable. So are the words in the songs. Poetry was so palpable throughout the movie and that made it even more enjoyable to me. Some friends who had seen it told it was an okay-movie. Of course, to them it was a fun-watch, as much as it is. Even the jokes were enhanced when I watched it. Anyway, that was an energetic movie. One I had seen after a long time with excellent dialogues. There were many points that made me think of taking my notepad and pencil more than once. Such an infectious spirit…!

More than pictures and writings that portray the hard realities and dark corners of life, the cruelties and the sad parts, what people want is Love, Hope and Dreams. I could feel that from the smiles of my readers. And then I knew what I would write always. It would be about love. And it would be about the good things it brings. There would also be the wistful moments, the tiny twinges of pains that come with love, but things that you all can relate to. And even if for a short moment, realize that you were never really alone…
Like I said, “I do not want to be just a doctor who writes, but a writer who heals…”

So friends, give it out, you’re afraid to love only when you are selfish. When all you think of is your pain, your heart, instead of who would find comfort in a little of your love. Dare to take the first step always. Often regrets come from things we didn’t do, but wish we did, instead of things we did in the whim of a moment.
So, laugh when you feel like it, cry when you are sad, hug when you can’t contain it within yourself, hold a hand reassuringly when you know someone needs it… Love is so much easier when expressed than held back…

Even when it might all be lost on the ones you loved, you’ll have one thing to console yourself, one soul- gratifying thought – that, “I Tried…

Now that we have talked about some thoughts, let me wind up with some updates about my writing. 🙂
* I completed the manuscript of my second poetry book! The Room of Mirrors : Reflections in Words has 102 poems with 10 poems that are used as section breaks.
Today, I will take its print out to submit it for a critique to a critic/translator/reviewer. Now that gives me a feeling of accomplishment!
* The novel is still in a standstill. Maybe it could use a dose of Causticum (A point for Homoeopaths. 😉 )
* Poetry is everflowing. My latest verse has been just four lines. That goes like this:

“Dying a bit everyday
Is my destiny…
But that being for you
Was my choice…”

* And now, here’s the epilogue I wrote for The Room of Mirrors. These three quatrains may look a bit abstract to you. That’s because you still have to read the book from the beginning. 🙂 To understand this poem. But to those who are quite good at reading poetry (unlike me, of course.), here’s it. It’s titled To Conclude…

“A Tear rolls down slowly,

Takes its place on the Mirror

And it glows in the reflections

Of Love, Fight and Terror…

 

A Smile blossoms gently,

Takes its space on the Mirror

And it spreads the luminescence

Of Bliss, Care and Candor…

 

A Word is voiced out softly,

It looks for a grip to stay,

But it slips, shatters across,

To times and hearts away…”


So have a great day everyone! I am off to take my day the usual Sunday-way. 🙂

Love Always, Sana

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